Apart from the appalling hung parliament that was thrown up by the recent federal election, and my absolute horror at the prospect of having Tony Abbott as Prime Minister for the next three years, August has been a bad month for me.
I’ve been miserable this Winter here in Melbourne. I feel like there’s been no sunlight at all. Just relentless grey cloud, hanging over all of us, but not favouring us with much rain.
I discovered I was pregnant (a combination of huzzah! and OMFG! feelings followed).
Then I miscarried.
Then, when I was miserable and being comforted by Darren, my mother phoned to tell me that my father had died.
I had to fly to Perth to sort out his affairs and organise the funeral. At least the weather was sunny and mild for the most part.
It was very sudden, apparently his heart just stopped. He didn’t tell anyone he was ill.
He did not leave a will or any instructions. We’ve been forced to just make arrangements and hope that he would have approved. The memory of him in his coffin is going to haunt me for months, perhaps my whole life. He looked so small because of their stupid shroud, which I ended up pushing aside. He was not a small man. And he looked so well – they’d put makeup on him – he looked like he was about to sit up and say “haha, suckers!”
It’s now September, the start of Spring. And thank the gods. Though the weather’s as bleak and miserable today as the winter has been, it’s at least not as cold.
I am going to disable comments as I recognise that all my f-list will feel the appropriate sympathies. Best wishes to you all. x
I love you Dad.
